There are two phrases I know I don't say to you enough. One of said phrases is easier to speak, yet regrettably and neglectfully underused in my conversations with you. The other phrase is, well it's complicated for me to utter, so I ask for your forgiveness if I occasionally stutter through. So… might as well say the complicated first. I’ve wracked and rewritten this little bit in my brain numerous times because I continue to find these words, not necessarily bitter to swallow. Just... although there is acknowledgement in certain shortcomings of my own devices, I don’t want it misconstrued that I am ashamed of the way my life is being written.
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With the exception of a few close friends, most people I told about an impending trip to Egypt were shocked. They were even more surprised to learn that I wanted to stay, for an extended amount of time. But when they asked why, I had no answer. I could only explain that I was NOT going to Egypt just so I could snap a few pictures with pyramids, gawk at local cuisines or follow the well worn trails of tourists circulating through the country like a passing gust of wind.
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Albert Einstein is purported to have said “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.” Of course, Einstein never met my mother during the holiday season. On one hand, I appreciate her persistence in wanting to get things just right to have a near perfect family Thanksgiving and/or Christmas. Her tenacity knows no bounds. But at some point, it just became way too much pressure despite the fact that it felt like something was always going wrong, like that one time during the holidays where literally everyone got sick except for my paternal step-grandfather.
The point I’m trying to make is that in this instance, the United States is like my parents; always trying to make the same thing work despite something always going wrong. This is especially true when it comes to the United States’s relationship status with capitalism, which I think many would agree be best described as “it’s complicated.” If you’d like to discover how complicated things are between the United States and Capitalism, well my friend, you are going to want to read this entire deep dive on medium though a link here, by clicking on the title or image.
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After I found my voice in an after school poetry club in 8th grade, I embraced the weirdo label. It usually made people laugh. I was proud to be a teenager who loved black and white movies, quoting bits from comedians and wearing bright, almost neon pants to school and lime green or cherry red suits to the high school dances.
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